Funny Blonde Jokes and Blonde Humor

Car Wreck

Posted on: July 15, 2009

There was a red head, brunette, and a blonde driving in a convertible car. They were driving to fast and flew over a gaurd rail and they landed in a river. The red head and the brunette float up to the surface. Why didn’t the blonde?

-Her door was locked!

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How do you regonize a blonde in school?
They are the only ones who erase their notebook when the teacher erases the board.

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Hot Pepsi

Posted on: July 10, 2009

Why did the blonde have to drink a hot pepsi?
Because she couldn’t fit any ice into the bottle.

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Six Please

Posted on: July 8, 2009

A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces.
Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces.” 

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There is a brunette and a blonde hanging over the edge of a cliff off a piece of rope. They realize that the rope will break if one of them doesn’t let go and they will both fall to their deaths. The brunette starts this big heartwarming speech about how she is going to sacrifice herself. At the end of the speech the blonde starts clapping.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are running from the cops. They hide on a potato farm. They crawl into some potato bags. The first cop pokes the bag with the brunette in it. She says, “Meow.” The cop confirms that it is just a cat. The second cop pokes the bag with the redhead in it. She says, “Woof.” The cop says that it is just a dog. The third cop pokes the bag with the blonde in it. She say in her sweetest voice, “Potato.

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, “Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can’t figure out how to get it started.

He asks, “What is it supposed to be when it’s finished?

The blonde says, “According to the picture on the box, it’s a tiger.

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, “First of all, no matter what we do, we’re not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger.

He takes her hand and says, “Second, I want you to relax. Let’s have a nice cup of tea, and then…..” he sighed, “we’ll put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box.